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  • Writer's pictureNoah

Midnight Meme Of The Day! Republican National Committee Announces Trump Pity Party!!!




by Noah


Dateline New York City:


In a joint Zoom call announcement tonight, Republican Chairnazi Ronna Romney McDaniel and Russian President For Life Vlad Putin called upon all Republicans everywhere to purchase tickets for their upcoming Trump Pity Party to be held at Mar-a-Lago, appropriately on Halloween night. Sean Hannity was also present and stated that the Trump Pity Party will be broadcast live on FOX-Goebbels TV as part of a national telethon to raise money for the Trumps. Tucker Carlson will be in charge of similar efforts on Russian State TV.


Romney McDaniel had this to say:


Hunter Biden's laptop. What is being done to the Trumps, this great American family, is a travesty and shows, as the great thinkers of our time, men like Representatives Jim Jordan and Matt Gaetz continue to say, the high level of corruption in our justice system. Hunter Biden's laptop. How could anybody support these wicked communist witch hunts? Hunter Biden's laptop. Trans people. Hunter Biden's laptop. No one wants to see the Trumps lose their beautiful wonderful homes and golf courses! Tickets are $10,000 apiece and will come to purchasers in a nice gold commemorative envelope with a signed Kevin Sorbo photo and a Lauren Boebert bobble head doll! Hunter Biden's laptop. Trans people. Black people voting. Hunter Biden's laptop. Those who buy 2 or more of our very special $50,000 platinum tickets will receive one of our super-commemorative J-6 Honorary Cop Killer MAGA Hats signed by the great Donald Trump himself in "gold" filigree." Act fast if you want one. Only 5000 will be made! Hunter Biden's laptop.

To show his continued support, Moscow Mitch McConnell was on stage in attendance but had nothing to say. Kremlin Kevin McCarthy did not attend but issued a statement about Hunter Biden's laptop, and thanked Mr. Putin for his offer of "a nice villa in Crimea as soon as Donald Trump or 'some other republican' takes over the White House." Ms. Romney McDanial did not answer any questions pertaining to her hopes for a joint effort by Russia, China, and North Korea to aid her party in the 2024 election through misinformation campaigns and voting machine hacking, saying only, "Don't forget, we have friends in Saudi Arabia, too. So many options are on the table!"

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1 Comment


Guest
Oct 03, 2023

The thing about satire is that it has to have an element of plausibility.


This has more than an element.


We didn't fall in the labrea tar pits. We spent decades digging the hole above the tar deposit... and just keep jumping in. But nobody asks why we keep doing that.

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