by Noah In the end, it was easy for the Disney folks to capture Flor-i-duh's Governor Ron DeSantis. They just put out signs that said "Snow White-This Way!" and he went all in for it thinking it was a come on to his magical dream land of white supremacy. Once there, Goofy, Pluto, and Snow White herself tossed him into a vat of their special Magic Kingdom brew and out came Wokey! Seriously, though, is the idea any more insane than the Ron DeSantis of our own severely warped Twilight Zone dimension not only announcing his candidacy in the first place, but announcing it on Twitter with his fellow lunatic Elon Musk. I guess Rudy Giuliani just wouldn't make himself available, considering his ties to the Diaper Don and all that. What a strange universe we live in, a universe where bizarro creatures like DeSantis and Musk are not only taken seriously but held up as examples of achievement. It's all of a piece though. Once again, the Republican Primary will come off as some sort of whacked-out edition of "High School Musical" held in one of the country's remaining insane asylums. Not only that, but upwards of 70,000,000 people will say "That's for me!" come election day. Already, we have not one, but two, headcases from South Carolina in Nikki Haley and Tim Scott with their bubblehead comrade Lindsey Graham waiting in the wings, and now we have Ron DeSantis from the even weirder bizarro world of Flor-i-duh. These are what constitute the fresh new faces of the Domestic Terror Party, I guess. And, there's The Diaper Don, too! Mustn't forget him! What an embarrassment of riches!!!! And from the looks of it (so far), we won't (again, so far) have to be subjected to the party's golden oldie freakshow contestants such as Michele Bachmann, "Ted" Cruz, Jeb Bush, Ron Paul or his son Moonbat, Marco "$50 Blow Job In The Bushes" Rubio, Mittens "Free Stuff" Romney, Wisconsin Nazi Scott Walker, fake "moderates" like John Kasich and Chris Christie, "Braindead Ben" Carson, and, of course the fully, really dead Herman Cain. Rick "Can't Count to 3" Perry from the total nutstate of Texas is making noises, though, and Mike "Lord Of The Flies" Pence has high hopes. Oh, and let's not forget Mike Huckabee who always seems to pride himself on coming across as the funny uncle your parents would never leave you alone with, not too mention his interspecies daughter who openly dreams of being on the GOP ticket as the VP candidate. It has begun! And, remember: Never underestimate the American quest for the lowest common denominator or worse!
