top of page
  • Writer's pictureNoah

Midnight Meme Of The Day! Rancid Meat And Hold The Russian!

by Noah

In answer to the question posed by today's meme, if I was making a sandwich for the two traitors shown, I would just quickly go look for some rancid meat in a restaurant dumpster. However, since I take it to mean what would I make for myself, that would be much more involved. I think I would go out and get a very big turkey, very big, one that would take me about 5 hours to roast. Then, of course, I would want it to cool off for a bit before I started carving off some nice juicy slices for my sandwich. Mind you, I consider sandwich making to be an artform so it would take me some additional time to incorporate all of the touches I would want. I can be quite a perfectionist when it comes to making my sandwiches. I would, of course, also make my sandwich where they could see me taking my sweet time! Also, the sound of Hannity and Carlson splashing around and pleading for help to no avail, would provide a delightful "musical" soundtrack and a fitting one at that since the two cretins in question epitomize a whole party that ignores pleas for help from those in need with great sadistic pleasure.

OK. So, once I have made my sandwich, I would set up a little table closer to the water's edge and eat my sandwich slowly, so as to enjoy every little morsel. I'd probably also call a friend or two and send them a real time video of the goings on in the water while I eat. The video will get really great when the two drowning a-holes start trying to climb on top of eachother in order to keep their heads above water. Oh, and did I mention the grocery bag full of little rubber duckies? Yeah, I'd bring about a hundred of them and start pelting Hannity and Carlson with them. Back in the day, I could really throw a ball with excellent velocity. Now, not so much and it would hurt to attempt to do so, but, kind of guy that I am, I would be willing to sacrifice. What's a couple of days of pain as long as you get to watch two traitors sink below the surface for the last time?

Oh don't worry, I'm not quite so cruel. I'd throw them a roll of paper towels; just one though!

bottom of page