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  • Writer's pictureNoah

Midnight Meme Of The Day! Planet Earth's Suicide Pact!

by Noah

I know what yer thinkin'. Yer thinkin' we're devolving as a species. Who could blame ya? The evidence we're confronted with just grows and grows and grows. Every. Damn. Day! Whether it's the willful failure to address climate change, pollution, disease or even the disease of politics, the people of this planet are one giant suicide cult! There aren't enough cups of cyanide-laced grape juice to satisfy the demand! I predict that there will soon be mega churches where people will put on their MAGA hats and pray loudly for a 1000 mile diameter asteroid to come blazing out of the sky and end it all. They will attempt to will it to happen. Some nutball billionaire will even send up a rocket to divert one our way! No doubt the first such church will be in Texas but, wherever it opens, it will come, and FOX "News" and AON will devote all of their programming time to broadcasting the services and battle it out for the highest ratings. I can see it now! Pastor Tucker Carlson pesiding! But who needs a suicide mega churches when we can just just be lazy and do what they do in Somalia, Florida, Mozambique, or any other of the top godforsaken hellholes! It may take longer but, hey, same result.

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