Midnight Meme Of The Day! Perfect! McConnell's Inner Man Shines Through!

by Noah

I gotta tell ya! I went out and bought myself a brand new dartboard today. I mean, hey, you can see why! That's how damn inspiring I found this portrait to be. Is it McConnell? Is it Trump? Nope! It's Moscow McTrumpitch! 2 Russian agents in one!

Moscow Don and Moscow Mitch, now fully blended together! It was bound to happen. Racism, rubles, misogyny, corruption of every kind in a perfect blend. 2 becoming 1. Is the above picture the result of some sort of Dorian Gray scenario gone hideous to the max? Is it some variation of that thing where people eventually start to resemble their dog and vice versa? Well, here you are. As time goes on, it won't be just Mitch and his master, it'll be every Republican $enator. They're all be so wrapped up in catering to Trump's every psychotic whim that they will soon actually begin to look like him just like you see above. They're already total Trump freaks to their cores so they might as well look the part! The shapeshifting began quite a while ago but it's impossible not to notice it now! I think the transformation of "Ted" Cruz into Trump will be the most fascinating to watch. Talk about things you'll never be able to unsee!

Meanwhile, first thing tomorrow, I will be calling the Dept. of Justice to make a small request for 11,270 indictments. It's the least I can do as a citizen. That's just for laughs of course, since our justice system is still a never ending joke. Prove me wrong, Merrick. Go ahead, make my day!