by Noah
"No one does theft like me. I do the best steals, the art of the steal. That I can tell you. Believe me!"
If he could have, Donald Trump would have stolen the original Declaration of Independence, too, not to mention having a gang of his Russian mob buddies go to Philadelphia to steal the Liberty Bell which would now be painted gold and hanging in his Bedminster man cave where his Saudi guests would be invited to crush out cigars on it while Roger Stone and his Proud Boys cheer them on. For Christmas, Trump would then send numbered private autographed photos of the Saudis doing it to all of the $enators who enabled him by aquitting him at his impeachment trials. Moscow Mitch McConnell would get #1, of course. Un-numbered mass editions would then be made available in a facsimile Top Secret folder to all Republican voters via the Trump/GOP "Save America" pac. They'd be gone in minutes.