by Noah
Happy Friday the 13th everybody! What could possibly go wrong today? Now that Congress has broken its own Clown-o-Meter, we'll just have to turn on our TVs and sit back and watch America's number one shitshow, "Real Douchebags Of Washington!" It's all sponsored by korporate Amerika, of course.
The new House of Representatives is off to a rousing start! Kremlin Kev is the Speaker, flashing White Power signs is the new official greeting, his party is embracing a totally unhinged lunatic named "George Santos" and Marjorie Traitor Greene has been named Princess.
So, what was the first thing Kremlin Kev did with his new powers? What about all those things he and his clown car party ran on? Did he tackle gas prices? Um, no, they've already gone down. Inflation? Nah, that seems to be slowing down. How about immigration? No, Republicans talk a good game but they like to vote against the money needed. Health care? Nope! Give up? Well, c'mon! The very first thing Kremlin Kev's Krew did was to toss the House Ethics Committee into the dumpster, douse it with kerosene and throw in one of their many Tucker Carlson Brand™ lit tiki torches. Then, as a bonus, they passed some sort of wacko anti-abortion law that says you can't kill a baby once it's been born alive. Earth to Repugs! Earth to Repugs! That's already illegal! Very illegal! And, they voted to defund the IRS so the people who fund their campaigns can just ignore their taxes all together. Talk about tax cuts! That's how the repugs are delivering new tax cuts now!
Stay tuned as Kev and his loonies take their obsessions with Hunter Biden's dick pics to new heights! Who gets first look, Patrick McHenry or Lauren Boebert? Or, does Lindsey come over and pull rank? Personally, I'd be more concerned about Clarence Thomas's wife than Hunter's laptop. Just sayin' but then, I'm not a traitor.