• Noah

Midnight Meme Of The Day!

by Noah

If only. If Only.

Theoretically, of course, Donnie Death Machine, aka The Orange Menace To Society, could still be removed from the presidency via the 25th Amendment but then, theoretically, he could and should have been removed via conviction after his impeachment. If only we had had enough responsible, patriotic adults in the Hou$e and $enate to do so. But, we don't. Both parties in Congress, especially Putin's boys on the Repug side of the aisle, have demonstrated that they are exceedingly soft on presidential crime, and the cabinet is even worse. Yeah, hard to believe, I know.

Even today, at this late date, either means of removal would be more than just appropriate and one (Why not both?) could be used for the good of the country and the world. Trump's removal this very day could still save lives but the people, if you insist on calling them that, who have worked to keep their boy in the oval office made a conscious decision to be complicit in mass murder and all of the other mayhem that Trump has perpetrated. I see Trump as Charles Manson and I see Moscow Mitch and his minions (Graham, Cruz, Johnson, Grassley, Scott, et. al.) as the Manson girls who went off to kill as many people as they could. Or, should I just call Trump Jim Jones and call the congressional republicans and the administration (AlexAzar, Emily Murphy, Kayleigh McEnany, Mike Pence, et. al.) those who handed out the grape juice/cyanide cocktail. No matter what comparison one uses, they are complicit in the murder of over a quarter of a million American deaths, and there is no end in sight. There are 60+ days left of the Trump administration. That's 60 days in which The Orange Menace can, with the continuing assistance of the likes of those I just mentioned, continue to plan and do irreparable harm to our individual futures and our country's future, but, as I always have said, Washington takes care of its own. It should be obvious by now that if Trump had Zyklon B pumped into the ventilation systems of our border detention centers, they would still do nothing other than make excuses saying "I don't really care, do you?" The final proof of that will be if anyone named Trump, or some other cretinous assclown like the Trumps, ever gets another term in the White House, and, unless the current monster is tried and punished to the absolute fullest extent of the law that will happen as assuredly as not punishing Nixon begat Trump. That's directed at you, Joe Biden!

Now comes the super duper fantastical part of this fantasy: I see one big possible advantage to impeaching, convicting, and removing Trump, or, invoking the 25th Amendment immediately. I may be wrong but I'd like to think that at least one of the two approaches would make for an interesting legal case. I'll take a wild leap and suppose that, in a mythical sane country, either step would negate the opportunity for Trump to pardon himself. Did the Founding Fathers think of this one? Would it fall into the laps of the so-called Supreme Court? The key is the president would have to not just be impeached but convicted. The idea of a convicted president pardoning himself has obviously never been tested in the courts.

Sadly, most of the political and media class say that a president can issue a self pardon as Trump obviously plans to do. So, that's a big reason why he should have already been convicted and removed. Of course, doing that would take more than 60 or so days but if all the big ifs fell into place and the courts decided against the president, then the president could be tried for any or all federal crimes as, morally, he should be. So, why not start the process today? We'd have to suffer the remaining 60+ days of deliberate chaos and mayhem as we have to anyway but the bottom line end result would be moral, righteous, and set an example to any future vermin that our Idiocracy hands the White House to. At least one former congressperson with some serious background in the subject says, and says eloquently, that even an unconvicted president cannot self-pardon. Former representative Elizabeth Holtzman has ably stated the case in a U.S.A Today Op-Ed. It's well worth reading.

Sigh, the even less likely invoking of the 25th Amendment is just so much quicker, if only slightly cleaner. As Nike says, "Just Do It." I kinda like the idea of a corporation's logo coming to symbolize the removal of the worst president and biggest danger this country has faced since the Cuban Missile Crisis. The stated reason would have to be a simple "Unable to properly fill out the duties of the president," something Trump has proven every day, and the wording should not leave anything that could be used as, let's say, an insanity defense at any ensuing trial. Nothing regarding the use of the 25th amendment has ever been to court either but, if the people in authority actually did the right thing for once, we at least wouldn't have to go through a lengthy congressional process. Just make the move. I'd have 6 very large, very loud, and very proud lesbians of color haul his orange ass, kicking and screaming, out of the White House and thrown into an armored truck on Pay-Per-View.

I know what your thinkin' at this point: You're thinkin' but Noah, Pence would become President and would pardon him. But, would he? Pence has made it clear that he dearly wants to be president someday. He has stated that he has aimed to be president since he was 16. He's been obsessed with the opportunity. So, the chance to make him president grants him his wish, if only for a few weeks. Sad. Mikey just wasn't specific enough with his wish. You really have to do that, you know, Mikey. That sort of not being specific thing comes with weak brain power.

But here's the best part (other than a quicker, country-saving exit for Donnie Death Machine) and I find it deliciously appealing: Dear Mikey will have to choose between pardoning Trump for his federal crimes, the details of which will continue to come out one way or another whether there are trials or not, or, not pardoning him. If Mikey pardons Trump, the words "Gerald Ford" will toll on him like giant cast iron bells, and look what happened to Gerald Ford's aspirations of being elected in his own right when he pardoned Scumbag Nixon; and each revelation will make those bells toll louder and louder.

On the other hand, if Mikey doesn't pardon Trump, the republican party, or at least its "base" (same thing now), will hate the mere mention of Pence forever and ever, amen. Either scenario likely destroys Pence's chances at ever being elected president. Better yet if it pushes Pence into the final stages of being a total catatonic vegetable. He's close as it is. Choose yer poison, Mikey! Are ye a bettin' man? It's quite a tortuous quandary and it's a tortuous quandary that a fragile nutcase like Mikey could not survive, "Mother" or no "Mother." He would be covered in flies from head to toe, at least in his mind, and no bottle, "Mother," or gay fraternity house could possibly save him. No Trump. No Pence. Two for the price of one.