by Noah
A Yule Log For 2020:
Christmas is almost here, and in New York the weather has turned cold and snowy, almost like the old days. So, what better time to light up a fire and burn some MAGA hats? They burn slowly but that's OK. I think of them as a kind of voodoo doll and imagine some key White House traitor types feeling inexplicably hot. Maybe they'll even start having black streaks running down their faces soon.
Of course, what I'd rather do is go out in the backyard, expand the old barbecue pit and put Trump on a spit luau-style. I'd have no shortage of people who I could get to come over and take turns turning the spit.
Have a nice, warm weekend!