Well, the big day is now just one month away! Do you have your tickets? Don't forget to take everything you need! Do you have your MAGA hat? Your flag pole spear? Your taser stick? Zipties? Bear spray? Make that list and check it twice!
Do you have your Camp Auschwitz shirt, too, or are you dressing up as Chewbacca with horns? No matter. Either way, you will be most welcome and fit right in! You're also welcome to wear your KKK hood and sheet gear! In fact, we encourage it! It makes quite an impression! And, please, don't bathe, shave, or shower at all in the next month! You don't want the other attendees to suspect you're a Democrat, do you?
Please add Republican Party logos to your sheets or shirt sleeves if you haven't already! Special stick-on FOX, AON, Newsmax, Brietbart, and Republican Party Elephant logo patches will also be made available for purchase at all of the onsite RNC concession stands and are highly recommended. After all, nothing says unity more than a republican logo on your KKK outfit or Camp Auschwitz shirt! Don't forget your Confederate, Trump, or Swastika flag! No sweat if you can't carry all three, seeing as they're totally interchangeable anyway. MAGA! MAGA!