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  • Writer's pictureNoah

Midnight Meme Of The Day! The Teachings Of Republican Jesus!

by Noah

Sunday Thoughts:

As a list of the teachings of Republican Jesus, tonight's meme ain't bad but, in the interest of me not wanting to seem at all hypocritical, I'll just say that I would definitely, whenever realistic, do unto Republicans before they do to me (Dems like Manchin and that dipshit from Arizona, too), and I can definitely go along with "Do Not Kill Unless They Deserve it." But, while we're on the topic of hypocrisy, shouldn't we drug test the shit out of Republicans? There has to be some explanation for what Republicans do and say besides mass mental illness, or does there? I mean just look at them: "Ted" Cruz? That clown's brain is full of holes like swiss cheese due to what must be years of meth abuse. Lindsey Graham? If he doesn't appear to be a total drug burnout, I don't know who does. Mike Pence? Man, he got way into Mother's tranquilizer supply decades ago. Either that or it was PCP. Donnie the Sniffer? C'mon! Do you have to ask? Are you really that naive? Republican voters? Well, someone's electing these whacked out goons!

So, here's a proposal: Since the Biden administration arranged for 500,000,000 Home COVID tests to be distributed throughout the country, we might as well go for drug tests, too; just to the needy, of course, ie. Republicans. If Florida can drug test their recipients of social services, surely we should drug test our politicians. Send the tests out with some nice orange spray tan so they can make themselves up just like their Dear Leader.

Addendum: May Day is upon us, folks. May Day! May Day! And the warning gets louder every damn year. A fully loaded 125 car freight train headed by five 3500 horsepower diesels is headed right into the intersection and no one hears the horn.

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